Story developing.

UPDATE: Ellen herself responds to this news: “You know I like to tell you what’s going on in my life. So today, I will tell you what’s going on in my life because TMZ is also telling you what’s going on in my life. So I’ll tell you at the same time that they’re telling you. What happened was, last night I was having chest pains. So this morning the paramedics came to look at me. First of all, I’m fine. Let me just say, I’m fine. The paramedics were strippers that I had called. That’s how the rumors got started.”

Ellen continued, “I woke up in the middle of the night. I was feeling like a tightness of my chest and all the scary things… like something was heavy on my chest and it was a cat so I moved it. I still felt the tightness and heaviness so there was another cat under that cat. There were two cats on my chest. Then I got to work and it was still happening. I was still feeling the pains. So I was like, ya know, I should check this out. It’s better to be safe than sorry. Who doesn’t want to see a fireman occasionally?”

“…We called the paramedics here on the Warner Bros. lot and about 50 trucks and ambulances, like one marching band short of a parade showed up outside of my office. Then they come in with an axe. Break the door down. It was open. I don’t know why they did that. They came in, they asked me all the questions; how are you feeling? When did it start? Family history? Can I get tickets to the ’12 Days?’ All the questions that they would ask, but everything is fine. I don’t know what it is, but it’s fine.”
“I have a baboon heart that I had put in earlier… it’s not true. But I want to say thank you to all the paramedics and the nurses who showed up and everybody and TMZ for caring so much… I appreciate it. Thank you.”